Who Did You Marry? 79 Premarital Counseling Questions

Marriage is about love and strengthening the bond between two people. It should be a happy time, but sometimes things don’t work out as they should. Some people marry someone only to find out they are complete strangers. Other times, people realize that they are married and have completely different values.

To make sure you’re both on the same page and understand your partner, you should ask a few questions. Here are 79 premarital counseling questions to make sure you and your future spouse are ready to get married.

79 Premarital Counseling Questions


Questions about Money

1. How do you feel about saving money?
2. How important is money to you?
3. How do you feel about the investment?
4. Do you want the same or separate accounts?
5. Do you have any debt?
6. How do you feel about debt?
7. Do you have a budget and what does it look like?
8. How are finances controlled?
9. Who pays the bills?
10. Who manages the finances?
11. Who is in charge of fundraising?
12. What are your spending habits?

Questions about Sex

1. What is your opinion about sex in a relationship?
2. How much sex do you think is good in a relationship?
3. How important is a sexual relationship to you?
4. What is considered betrayal to you?
5. What is your biggest sexual fantasy?
6. What turns you off?
7. What gets you in the mood?
8. What do you think about your partner’s past sexual history?
9. Do you have set room boundaries?

Questions for the Future

1. Do you want children?
2. How many children do you want to have?
3. Where do you want to go during the holidays?
4. Do you want a pet?
5. What kind of pets do you like?
6. How to treat friends and family members as a couple?
7. What kind of pets do you dislike?
8. Where do you see yourself living?
9. Do you prefer living in the city or the countryside?
10. How much do you expect the two of us to work together?
11. Do you want or expect to change careers in the future?

Questions about Conflict

1. How do you handle conflict?
2. Are you open to couples therapy if needed?
3. Is your career or family more important?
4. Do you hold on to issues or bring them up as they happen?
5. Will you choose me or your family in times of disagreement?
6. What are your conflict boundaries?
7. What are the absolute deal-breakers?
8. What happens if an agreement is not fulfilled?

Same Page

Questions to Make Sure You’re on the Same Page

1. How do you want to raise your children?
2. What is your opinion about birth control?
3. If you don’t want children, what types of birth control can you take?
4. What religion do you want to teach your children?
5. Do you want your children to be educated at home or at school?
6. Do you have limits, boundaries, or expectations about other people outside the relationship such as family members, friends, or coworkers?
7. What does marriage and commitment mean to you?
8. What is your religion?
9. Do you expect your partner’s faith to match your faith?
10. How much time do you expect to spend with each other in the relationship?
11. How much free time do you want?
12. What is the perfect marriage for you?

Questions to Reveal All

1. What do you value most in your relationship?
2. How much time do you spend with friends during the week?
3. What do you usually do when you come home from work?
4. How do you feel about your partner’s family?
5. How is your sex life with your partner?
6. Why is marriage important to you?
7. Do you agree with all of your partner’s life choices? Which one is not yours?
8. How do you feel about the prenuptial?
9. Is it okay if I visit family or friends for two weeks at a time?
10. Are you against the move?
11. Do you have any health issues that your partner should know about?
12. Do you feel any doubts about marrying your partner?

Relationship Papers Questions

1. How do you like to divide household chores?
2. If there are children, who stays with them?
3. What role do you want in marriage?
4. What role do you expect your partner to play?
5. Who is in charge of major decisions?
6. Who will be ahead in their career?
7. What kind of support do you expect from your spouse?
8. How do you include your spouse in important decisions?

Questions to Deepen the Relationship

1. What do you like and appreciate about your partner?
2. How do you express love and affection?
3. What are your core values ​​and how do they match those of your colleagues?
4. How do you want your partner to express love and affection?
5. What makes you two compatible?
6. How do you maintain your personal identity?
7. Who is your role model for a perfect marriage?

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